Algal Bloom  

Energy Bulletin has resurrected another ABC broadcast from earlier this year by Geoffrey Chia which discusses the artificial generation of "phytofuels" as the solution to oil depletion (the logical conclusion of the biofuels from alge or kelp ideas). I quite like his closing paragraphs.

I believe that research into artificial photosynthesis is far more likely to yield breakthroughs than the search for controlled nuclear fusion. After all, we have no precedent for the occurrence of controlled nuclear fusion on Earth and it may never be possible to achieve this. Plants, however, have been quietly performing photosynthesis under ambient conditions for billions of years. We just need to discover how to mimic them. Surely it is not beyond human ability to find out how a primitive unicellular blue-green alga works.

In conclusion, let me use a metaphor to describe our present situation. We are rapidly steaming ahead through dense fog on board a ship very much like the Titanic. Our radar indicates there is a huge iceberg directly in our path (the iceberg is a composite representation of the impending industrial and agricultural collapse consequent to petroleum depletion, as well as the dire effects of global warming). The iceberg is half a mile away. Unfortunately we need two miles of seaway to stop our ship and our rudder is jammed, hence we cannot change course. Our Captain (who represents America) used to be a benevolent and helpful fellow, but has recently been gripped by an aggressive madness. An Arab crewmate named Saudi recently slapped the Captain in the face (remember that in the September 11 hijackings, 15 of the 19 hijackers were Saudi nationals) so the Captain did the natural thing and beat another Arab crewmate named Iraq to a bloody pulp. All those Arabs look alike anyway, so he was fully justified. In any case, he needs Saudi to bring him his food.

We all know how to survive the impending collision with the iceberg: engage full reverse thrust to slow the ship down and lessen the impact, and lower the lifeboats to save the passengers.

The Captain has at different times denied the existence of the iceberg on the radar or dismissed its importance; we can crash through it, no problem, he says. Stoke up the boilers and full speed ahead. He claims it is all a left-wing conspiracy, although he cannot explain how or why those shifty left-wingers could or would fabricate such evidence.

We cannot overpower the Captain and take command. He has adopted a Rambo mentality and carries knives, guns and grenades on his person which he will not hesitate to use. We are either with him or against him, he says. All we carry are tiny nailclippers with spiky bits. The first mate, Britain, who is currently stomping on Iraq's face with hobnail boots, has come to accept the existence of the iceberg, but has done precious little except make a few token statements.

Some European crew members have begun to lower lifeboats and round up their favourite passengers.

Australia is a lowly midshipman who has always been loyal to the Captain. Despite our tiny stature, we have had the dumb good fortune to be blessed with morbid obesity. Our exuberant rolls of fat (representing our coal and uranium resources) serve as insulation and flotation, hence we will be able to survive much longer than anyone else in the frigid waters after the ship sinks.